Dinner- I am sad, depressed. Its kind of an empty, devoid feeling within. Tonight's dinner was horrible, an utter mistake. I wish i could just leave it down onto the sand and wait for the tide to pull it away, away as in as far as possible...But no, it had to be written in stone, engraved in cold solid stone. I cried. Some say that i never seem sad, but today, more specifically tonight, i am of utter depression. The fish eye that was left on that dinner table tonight, it stares at me, its agony pervading my spirit. Its a rare occasion of which i cried, many have not seen me cry before, even i cant remember the last time i did. But today, i cried bitter, no its more than bitter. I cried of desperation, of complete desolation. hmm...
I could not breath, nor could i hold back the tears of which i thought i could clench within, bottle it in. But he is right, he would all burst one day, i hit hard, hard cold and painfully. The tears seemed like the sea, uncontrolled, unstoppable...
But IT IS my fault. I damn myself for being so emotional, i damn myself for always holding it back and within. I hate myself.....why...*snivell**he is right, the world is cold, and foggy.....i actually trusted her....its sad....but its the truth...the world's cold....we came to this place alone....and probably, we will have to leave alone...
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